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EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE A Bantam Book PUBLISHING HISTORY Bantam hardcover edition published October 1995 Bantam trade paperback edition published July 1997 Bantam 10th anniversary trade paperback edition published October 2005 Bantam 10th anniversary hardcover edition / October 2006 Published by Bantam Dell A Division o...
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Contents Cover Title Page Copyright Introduction Aristotle’s Challenge PART ONE THE EMOTIONAL BRAIN 1. What Are Emotions For? 2. Anatomy of an Emotional Hijacking PART TWO THE NATURE OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE 3. When Smart Is Dumb 4. Know Thyself 5. Passion’s Slaves 6. The Master Aptitude 7. The Roots ...
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PART FOUR WINDOWS OF OPPORTUNITY 12. The Family Crucible 13. Trauma and Emotional Relearning 14. Temperament Is Not Destiny PART FIVE EMOTIONAL LITERACY 15. The Cost of Emotional Illiteracy 16. Schooling the Emotions Appendix A: What Is Emotion? Appendix B: Hallmarks of the Emotional Mind Appendix C: The Neural Circuit...
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Introduction OceanofPDF.com Tenth Anniversary Edition of Emotional Intelligence In 1990, in my role as a science reporter at The New York Times , I chanced upon an article in a small academic journal by two psychologists, John Mayer, now at the University of New Hampshire, and Yale’s Peter Salovey. Mayer and Salovey ...
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I remember having the thought, just before this book was published ten years ago, that if one day I overheard a conversation in which two strangers used the phrase emotional intelligence and both understood what it meant, I would have succeeded in spreading the concept more widely into the culture. Little did I know....
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German and Portuguese, Chinese, Korean, and Malay. (Even so, I prefer EI as the English abbreviation for emotional intelligence. ) My e- mail inbox often contains queries from, for example, a doctoral student in Bulgaria, a schoolteacher in Poland, a college student in Indonesia, a business consultant in South Afric...
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language, so too should they master these essential skills for living. In Illinois, for instance, specific learning standards in SEL abilities have been established for every grade from kindergarten through the last year of high school. To give just one example of a remarkably detailed and comprehensive curriculum, in ...
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a statement of ten basic principles for implementing SEL to the
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ministries of education in 140 countries. In some states and nations SEL has become the organizing umbrella under which are gathered programs in character education, violence prevention, antibullying, drug prevention, and school discipline. The goal is not just to reduce these problems among schoolchildren but to enhan...
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The data show that SEL programs yielded a strong benefit in academic accomplishment, as demonstrated in achievement test results and grade-point averages. In participating schools, up to 50 percent of children showed improved achievement scores, and up to 38 percent improved their grade-point averages. SEL programs als...
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in SEL, reports not only that this program for elementary school students boosts academic achievement but, even more significantly, that much of the increased learning can be attributed to improvements in attention and working memory, key functions of the prefrontal cortex. 2 This strongly suggests that neuroplasticit...
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the federal government to American Express. Today companies worldwide routinely look through the lens of EI in hiring, promoting, and developing their employees. For instance, Johnson & Johnson (another CREIO member) found that in divisions around the world, those identified at midcareer as having high leadership poten...
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professors and others not counted in that database. 3 The growth of this area of scholarship owes much to Mayer and Salovey, who, along with their colleague David Caruso, a business consultant, have worked tirelessly on behalf of the scientific acceptance of emotional intelligence. By formulating a scientifically defen...
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Thomas Kuhn, should become progressively revised and refined as more stringent tests of its premises are made. That process seems well under way for EI. There are by now three main models of EI, with dozens of variations. Each represents a different perspective. That of Salovey and Mayer rests firmly in the tradition o...
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we must seek other factors to explain the rest. It does not mean, however, that emotional intelligence represents the rest of the factors in success: they certainly include a very wide range of forces—from the wealth and education of the family we are born into, to temperament, to blind luck and the like—in addition...
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skills than purely cognitive abilities. As it happens, some of these circumscribed realms are of major importance in our lives. One that comes to mind is health (as detailed in Chapter 11 ), to the extent that disturbing emotions and toxic relationships have been identified as risk factors in disease. Those who can ma...
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shown that IQ predicts which career rungs a person can manage. No question there. But IQ washes out when it comes to predicting who, among a talented pool of candidates within an intellectually demanding profession, will become the strongest leader. In part this is because of the “floor effect”: everyone at the top e...
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Primal Leadership: Learning to Lead with Emotional Intelligence (coauthored with Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee). At the very highest levels, competence models for leadership typically consist of anywhere from 80 to 100 percent EI-based abilities. As the head of research at a global executive search firm put it, “CE...
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While our emotional intelligence determines our potential for learning the fundamentals of self-mastery and the like, our emotional competence shows how much of that potential we have mastered in ways that translate into on-the-job capabilities. To be adept at an emotional competence like customer service or teamwor...
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to Primal Leadership .) In 1995 I reported data from a nationwide, demographically representative sample of more than three thousand children aged seven to sixteen, rated by their parents and teachers, showing that over the decade or so between the mid-1970s and mid-1980s, indicators of emotional well-being among Amer...
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unintended victims of economic and technological progress, deskilled in EI because their parents spend more time at work than in previous generations, because increased mobility has cut ties to extended family, and because “free” time has become so structured and overorganized. After all, emotional intelligence has tra...
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has done these studies, hypothesizes that the economic boom of the 1990s lifted children as well as adults; more jobs and less crime meant better childrearing. Should there be another major economic recession, he suggests, we would see another decline in this measure of children’s skills for life. That may well be; onl...
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their lives would improve, and their communities would be safer. I’d also like to see the scope of thinking about emotional intelligence itself expand, leaping from a focus on capacities within the individual to a focus on what emerges when people interact, whether one on one or in larger groups. Some research, notably...
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Aristotle’s Challenge Anyone can become angry—that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way—that is not easy . A RISTOTLE , The Nichomachean Ethics It was an unbearably steamy August afternoon in New York City, the kind of sweat...
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that cinema down the block? His delight in the rich possibilities the city offered was infectious. By the time people got off the bus, each in turn had shaken off the sullen shell they had entered with, and when the driver shouted out a “So long, have a great day!” each gave a smiling response. The memory of that encou...
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• At a local school, a nine-year-old goes on a rampage, pouring paint over school desks, computers, and printers, and vandalizing a car in the school parking lot. The reason: some third-grade classmates called him a “baby” and he wanted to impress them. • Eight youngsters are wounded when an inadvertent bump in a crowd...
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of failing to hold jobs, of drinking, of blaming his hard luck on foreigners. In a barely audible voice, he pleads, “I can’t stop being sorry for what we’ve done, and I am infinitely ashamed.” Each day’s news comes to us rife with such reports of the disintegration of civility and safety, an onslaught of mean-spirited ...
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read in numbers showing a jump in depression around the world, and in the reminders of a surging tide of aggression—teens with guns in schools, freeway mishaps ending in shootings, disgruntled ex-
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employees massacring former fellow workers. Emotional abuse, drive- by shooting , and post-traumatic stress all entered the common lexicon over the last decade, as the slogan of the hour shifted from the cheery “Have a nice day” to the testiness of “Make my day.” This book is a guide to making sense of the senseless...
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lets us understand more clearly than ever how the brain’s centers for emotion move us to rage or to tears, and how more ancient parts of the brain, which stir us to make war as well as love, are channeled for better or worse. This unprecedented clarity on the workings of emotions and their failings brings into focus so...
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changed by life experience, and that our destiny in life is largely fixed by these aptitudes. That argument ignores the more challenging question: What can we change that will help our children fare better in life? What factors are at play, for example, when people of high IQ flounder and those of modest IQ do surpr...
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seed of all impulse is a feeling bursting to express itself in action. Those who are at the mercy of impulse—who lack self-control—suffer a moral deficiency: The ability to control impulse is the base of will and character. By the same token, the root of altruism lies in empathy, the ability to read emotions in others;...
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brain’s emotional architecture that offer an explanation of those most baffling moments in our lives when feeling overwhelms all rationality. Understanding the interplay of brain structures that rule our moments of rage and fear—or passion and joy—reveals much about how we learn the emotional habits that can undermine...
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Part Three examines some key differences this aptitude makes: how these abilities can preserve our most prized relationships, or their lack corrode them; how the market forces that are reshaping our worklife are putting an unprecedented premium on emotional intelligence for on-the-job success; and how toxic emotions p...
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documents how pioneering schools are teaching children the emotional and social skills they need to keep their lives on track.
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Perhaps the most disturbing single piece of data in this book comes from a massive survey of parents and teachers and shows a worldwide trend for the present generation of children to be more troubled emotionally than the last: more lonely and depressed, more angry and unruly, more nervous and prone to worry, more imp...
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have wisdom; they guide our thinking, our values, our survival. But they can easily go awry, and do so all too often. As Aristotle saw, the problem is not with emotionality, but with the appropriateness of emotion and its expression. The question is, how can we bring intelligence to our emotions—and civility to our s...
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PART ONE THE EMOTIONAL BRAIN
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1 What Are Emotions For? It is with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye . A NTOINE DE S AINT -E XUPÉRY , The Little Prince Ponder the last moments of Gary and Mary Jane Chauncey, a couple completely devoted to their eleven-year-old daughter Andrea, who was confined to a wheelchai...
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2 Seen from the perspective of evolutionary biologists, such parental self-sacrifice is in the service of “reproductive success” in passing on one’s genes to future generations. But from the perspective of a parent making a desperate decision in a moment of crisis, it is about nothing other than love. As an insight int...
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choice to make. Sociobiologists point to the preeminence of heart over head at such crucial moments when they conjecture about why evolution has given emotion such a central role in the human psyche. Our emotions, they say, guide us in facing predicaments and tasks too important to leave to intellect alone—danger, pain...
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have gone too far in emphasizing the value and import of the purely rational—of what IQ measures—in human life. For better or worse, intelligence can come to nothing when the emotions hold sway. WHEN PASSIONS OVERWHELM REASON It was a tragedy of errors. Fourteen-year-old Matilda Crabtree was just playing a practical jo...
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daughter’s voice. Automatic reactions of this sort have become etched in our nervous system, evolutionary biologists presume, because for a long and crucial period in human prehistory they made the difference between survival and death. Even more important, they mattered for the main task of evolution: being able to be...
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architecture of mental life. In terms of biological design for the basic neural circuitry of emotion, what we are born with is what worked best for the last 50,000 human generations, not the last 500 generations—and certainly not the last five. The slow, deliberate forces of evolution that have shaped our emotions have...
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few lengths ahead of me. As I peered ahead I couldn’t make out
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anything; the swirling snow was now a blinding whiteness. Pressing my foot on the brake, I could feel anxiety flood my body and hear the thumping of my heart. The anxiety built to full fear: I pulled over to the side of the road, waiting for the flurry to pass. A half hour later the snow stopped, visibility returned, a...
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in every emotion. That emotions lead to actions is most obvious in watching animals or children; it is only in “civilized” adults we so often find the great anomaly in the animal kingdom, emotions—root impulses to act—divorced from obvious reaction. 6 In our emotional repertoire each emotion plays a unique role, as rev...
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allowing time to gauge whether hiding might be a better reaction. Circuits in the brain’s emotional centers trigger a flood of hormones
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that put the body on general alert, making it edgy and ready for action, and attention fixates on the threat at hand, the better to evaluate what response to make. • Among the main biological changes in happiness is an increased activity in a brain center that inhibits negative feelings and fosters an increase in av...
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This offers more information about the unexpected event, making it easier to figure out exactly what is going on and concoct the best plan for action. • Around the world an expression of disgust looks the same, and sends the identical message: something is offensive in taste or smell, or metaphorically so. The facial...
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experience and our culture. For instance, universally the loss of a loved one elicits sadness and grief. But how we show our grieving— how emotions are displayed or held back for private moments—is molded by culture, as are which particular people in our lives fall into the category of “loved ones” to be mourned. The p...
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parts of our emotional repertoire. While in the ancient past a hair- trigger anger may have offered a crucial edge for survival, the availability of automatic weaponry to thirteen-year-olds has made it too often a disastrous reaction. 8 Our Two Minds A friend was telling me about her divorce, a painful separation. Her...
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real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels. These two fundamentally different ways of knowing interact to
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construct our mental life. One, the rational mind, is the mode of comprehension we are typically conscious of: more prominent in awareness, thoughtful, able to ponder and reflect. But alongside that there is another system of knowing: impulsive and powerful, if sometimes illogical—the emotional mind. (For a more detail...
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knowing to guide us through the world. Ordinarily there is a balance between emotional and rational minds, with emotion feeding into and informing the operations of the rational mind, and the rational mind refining and sometimes vetoing the inputs of the emotions. Still, the emotional and rational minds are semi-indepe...
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herself hoarse, repeating formulas of virtue, while the other two bid her go hang herself, and are increasingly noisy and offensive, until at last their Ruler is exhausted,
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gives up, and surrenders. HOW THE BRAIN GREW To better grasp the potent hold of the emotions on the thinking mind —and why feeling and reason are so readily at war—consider how the brain evolved. Human brains, with their three pounds or so of cells and neural juices, are about triple the size of those in our nearest co...
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the threat of an attack. From the most primitive root, the brainstem, emerged the emotional centers. Millions of years later in evolution, from these emotional areas evolved the thinking brain or “neocortex,” the great bulb of convoluted tissues that make up the top layers. The fact that the thinking brain grew from th...
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composed of little more than thin layers of neurons gathered to analyze smell. One layer of cells took in what was smelled and sorted it out into the relevant categories: edible or toxic, sexually available, enemy or meal. A second layer of cells sent reflexive messages throughout the nervous system telling the body wh...
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to adapt to changing demands rather than having invariable and automatic reactions. If a food led to sickness, it could be avoided next time. Decisions like knowing what to eat and what to spurn were still determined largely through smell; the connections between the olfactory bulb and the limbic system now took on th...
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seat of thought; it contains the centers that put together and comprehend what the senses perceive. It adds to a feeling what we think about it—and allows us to have feelings about ideas, art, symbols, imaginings.
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In evolution the neocortex allowed a judicious fine-tuning that no doubt has made enormous advantages in an organism’s ability to survive adversity, making it more likely that its progeny would in turn pass on the genes that contain that same neural circuitry. The survival edge is due to the neocortex’s talent for stra...
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continues to develop. As we proceed up the phylogenetic scale from reptile to rhesus to human, the sheer mass of the neocortex increases; with that increase comes a geometrie rise in the interconnections in brain circuitry. The larger the number of such connections, the greater the range of possible responses. The neo...
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scope of the limbic area, the emotional brain plays a crucial role in neural architecture. As the root from which the newer brain grew, the emotional areas are intertwined via myriad connecting circuits to all
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parts of the neocortex. This gives the emotional centers immense power to influence the functioning of the rest of the brain—including its centers for thought.
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2 Anatomy of an Emotional Hijacking Life is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel . H ORACE W ALPOLE It was a hot August afternoon in 1963, the same day that the Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., gave his “I Have a Dream” speech to a civil rights march on Washington. On that day Richard Robles, a s...
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up. As he was leaving, Hoffert came home. To make good his escape, Robles began to tie her up, too. As Robles tells the tale years later, while he was tying up Hoffert, Janice Wylie warned him he would not get away with this crime: She would remember his face and help the police track him down. Robles, who had promised...
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Such emotional explosions are neural hijackings. At those moments, evidence suggests, a center in the limbic brain proclaims an emergency, recruiting the rest of the brain to its urgent agenda. The hijacking occurs in an instant, triggering this reaction crucial moments before the neocortex, the thinking brain, has had...
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someone as so uproarious that their laughter is almost explosive, that, too, is a limbic response. It is at work also in moments of intense joy: When Dan Jansen, after several heartbreaking failures to capture an Olympic Gold Medal for speed skating (which he had vowed to do for his dying sister), finally won the Gold ...
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most of the brain’s learning and remembering; the amygdala is the specialist for emotional matters. If the amygdala is severed from the rest of the brain, the result is a striking inability to gauge the emotional significance of events; this condition is sometimes called “affective blindness.” Lacking emotional weight,...
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sense of their place in their kind’s social order; emotion is blunted or absent. Tears, an emotional signal unique to humans, are triggered by the amygdala and a nearby structure, the cingulate gyrus; being held, stroked, or otherwise comforted soothes these same brain regions, stopping the sobs. Without an amygdala, t...
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to a decision. As we shall see, the workings of the amygdala and its interplay with the neocortex are at the heart of emotional intelligence.
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THE NEURAL TRIPWIRE Most intriguing for understanding the power of emotions in mental life are those moments of impassioned action that we later regret, once the dust has settled; the question is how we so easily become so irrational. Take, for example, a young woman who drove two hours to Boston to have brunch and spe...
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experience for trouble. This puts the amygdala in a powerful post in mental life, something like a psychological sentinel, challenging every situation, every perception, with but one kind of question in mind, the most primitive: “Is this something I hate? That hurts me? Something I fear?” If so—if the moment at hand so...
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the brainstem to fix the face in a fearful expression, freeze unrelated movements the muscles had underway, speed heart rate and raise blood pressure, slow breathing. Others rivet attention on the source of
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the fear, and prepare the muscles to react accordingly. Simultaneously, cortical memory systems are shuffled to retrieve any knowledge relevant to the emergency at hand, taking precedence over other strands of thought. And these are just part of a carefully coordinated array of changes the amygdala orchestrates as it c...
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answer, very likely, was his amygdala. In one of the most telling discoveries about emotions of the last decade, LeDoux’s work revealed how the architecture of the brain gives the amygdala a privileged position as an emotional sentinel, able to hijack the brain. 5 His research has shown that sensory signals from eye o...
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and other sensory organs transmit signals to the thalamus, and from there to sensory processing areas of the neocortex, where the signals are put together into objects as we perceive them. The signals are sorted for meanings so that the brain recognizes what each object is and what its presence means. From the neocort...
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us spring to action while the slightly slower—but more fully informed —neocortex unfolds its more refined plan for reaction. LeDoux overturned the prevailing wisdom about the pathways traveled by emotions through his research on fear in animals. In a crucial experiment he destroyed the auditory cortex of rats, then exp...
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repository for emotional impressions and memories that we have never known about in full awareness. LeDoux proposes that it is the
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amygdala’s subterranean role in memory that explains, for example, a startling experiment in which people acquired a preference for oddly shaped geometric figures that had been flashed at them so quickly that they had no conscious awareness of having seen them at all! 6 A visual signal first goes from the retina to th...
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7 Our emotions have a mind of their own, one which can hold views quite independently of our rational mind.
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THE SPECIALIST IN EMOTIONAL MEMORY Those unconscious opinions are emotional memories; their storehouse is the amygdala. Research by LeDoux and other neuroscientists now seems to suggest that the hippocampus, which has long been considered the key structure of the limbic system, is more involved in registering and makin...
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recognizing a face as that of your cousin. But it is the amygdala that adds you don’t really like her.” The brain uses a simple but cunning method to make emotional memories register with special potency: the very same neurochemical alerting systems that prime the body to react to life-threatening emergencies by fighti...
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are more likely, for example, to remember where we went on a first date, or what we were doing when we heard the news that the space
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shuttle Challenger had exploded. The more intense the amygdala arousal, the stronger the imprint; the experiences that scare or thrill us the most in life are among our most indelible memories. This means that, in effect, the brain has two memory systems, one for ordinary facts and one for emotionally charged ones. A...
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response to events perhaps only dimly similar, but close enough to alarm the amygdala. Thus a former army nurse, traumatized by the relentless flood of ghastly wounds she once tended in wartime, is suddenly swept with a mix of dread, loathing, and panic—a repeat of her battlefield reaction triggered once again, years l...
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particularly the hippocampus, which is crucial for narrative memories, and the neocortex, seat of rational thought, have yet to become fully developed. In memory, the amygdala and hippocampus work hand-in-hand; each stores and retrieves its special information independently. While the hippocampus retrieves information,...
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experience, when these emotional memories are triggered in later life there is no matching set of articulated thoughts about the response that takes us over. One reason we can be so baffled by our emotional outbursts, then, is that they often date from a time early in our lives when things were bewildering and we did n...
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there was no attic. The ceiling was intact, and so was I. My leap from bed while half-asleep—which might have saved me from injury had it truly been the ceiling falling—illustrates the power
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of the amygdala to propel us to action in emergencies, vital moments before the neocortex has time to fully register what is actually going on. The emergency route from eye or ear to thalamus to amygdala is crucial: it saves time in an emergency, when an instantaneous response is required. But this circuit from thalamu...
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critical milliseconds in reaction time to dangers. Those milliseconds could well have saved the lives of our protomammalian ancestors in such numbers that this arrangement is now featured in every mammalian brain, including yours and mine. In fact, while this circuit may play a relatively limited role in human mental l...
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of six dinners when she glimpsed a woman with a huge, curly mane of red hair—exactly like the woman her ex-husband had left her for.) Such inchoate emotional mistakes are based on feeling prior to thought. LeDoux calls it “precognitive emotion,” a reaction based on
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neural bits and pieces of sensory information that have not been fully sorted out and integrated into a recognizable object. It’s a very raw form of sensory information, something like a neural Name That Tune , where, instead of snap judgments of melody being made on the basis of just a few notes, a whole perception i...
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midnight that night, as she was getting ready for bed and heard the phone ring. Dropping her toothbrush, she raced to the phone, her heart pounding, images of Jessica in terrible distress racing through her mind. The mother snatched the receiver, and blurted, “Jessica!” into the phone—only to hear a woman’s voice say, ...
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appropriate response to our emotional impulses, modulating the amygdala and other limbic areas. Ordinarily the prefrontal areas govern our emotional reactions from the start. The largest projection of sensory information from the thalamus, remember, goes not to the amygdala, but to the neocortex and its many centers fo...
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11 For animals, when to attack, when to run. And for we humans … when to attack, when to run—and also, when to placate, persuade, seek sympathy, stonewall, provoke guilt, whine, put on a facade of bravado, be contemptuous—and so on, through the whole repertoire of emotional wiles. The neocortical response is slower in...
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prefrontal lobes or otherwise cut connections between the prefrontal cortex and the lower brain. In the days before any effective medications for mental illness, the lobotomy was hailed as the answer
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to grave emotional distress—sever the links between the prefrontal lobes and the rest of the brain, and patients’ distress was “relieved.” Unfortunately, the cost was that most of patients’ emotional lives seemed to vanish, too. The key circuitry had been destroyed. Emotional hijackings presumably involve two dynamics...
emotional_intelligence.pdf
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unpleasant emotions. The right prefrontal lobes are a seat of negative feelings like fear and aggression, while the left lobes keep those raw emotions in check, probably by inhibiting the right lobe. 14 In one group of stroke patients, for example, those whose lesions were in the left prefrontal cortex were prone to c...
emotional_intelligence.pdf
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